Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” – Yoda
Kindness, respect, love and gratitude, empathy, understanding, patience, tolerance. All traits that seem to be disappearing from humanity. When I come across someone who shows any of these qualities I like to point out to them that it’s noticed. That it’s valuable and esteemed. So many people cause hurt and pain under the lie of being strong and independent.
Strength is not anger and causing damage, it’s retaining our empathy and calm under the threat of being damaged. Strength is not in giving up but in pushing on. It’s those that sacrifice for others that show true tenacity, not those that leave a wake of hurt behind them to get to what they want. There’s no sacrifice in stepping on others to reach success. There is no honesty in using people. There is no honor in laughing at another’s pain.
I’m not implying we shouldn’t stand up for ourselves or allow ourselves to be abused. You can’t always turn the other cheek or quietly walk away. There is absolutely a way to be independent, not taken advantage of and successful while avoiding being selfish or cruel. We can pick our battles. We can take another person’s feelings into account in the things we say and decisions we make. We can put ourselves in their shoes. We can speak with empathy and understanding while explaining our point of view. We can stand up for ourselves while maintaining our grace.
People will hurt us, they will use us and take advantage of us. Despite what they think they are not independent and strong. They are weak and cowardly. Don’t let these people dull your shine or cause you to walk with your head down. Accept them for what they are. Forgive. True strength is continuing to be kind and loving in nature to all people despite the cruelty we are shown. It’s in getting up and brushing off the dust without giving into the ease and comfort of hate.
Hate is a waste of time and energy. Energy that could be used to demonstrate love and forgiveness. No one was ever eaten away by kindness. But hate and anger can destroy us, and that’s just what the bullies want. It makes life easier for them. They don’t have to feel guilty. You become a mirror of their actions and it justifies them. Instead choose real strength. They don’t know what to do with love and forgiveness, it’s foreign and uncomfortable to them.
We can’t change everyone and we can’t control anyone’s actions. But we can control ours. Choose to be strong. Choose to sacrifice. Choose to be compassionate and loving. Let Karma take care of the rest. 😉